Let Me In - Hebrews 4:16

Was on the MRT to work today. Felt really worn out due to a bad night on the sofa. Think I had put too much Bed Bug Killing pesticide on my mattress and it stinks so badly I had to drag myself down to the sofa in the living room to catch my wink. That was at 4am in the morning.

Funny how the pesticide reeks of petroleum smell. I suspect if there was a spark lit in my room, somebody would find my charred remains on what's left of my bed the next morning.

Coming back, I was on my way to work on the MRT this morning, and I was feeling really worn out. I was about to set myself into depression when I told myself that I'd listen to some United Live and pray in tongues to perk my spirit up. Better to exercise a little brain and tongue power than to slip into the devil's playground.

As I started praying, I saw myself, crying out to the Lord.

I stood before a towering door that reached to the heavens. It was made of black wood. I'm not sure why it was so dark. As I continued to bang at the door, I cried out, "Lord, let me in! Let me in!"

Slowly, but surely, the door began to open. And there was a bright shining light that pierced my eyes.

I soon recognised it as the courts of the Lord.

The door began to swing open to its fullest extent and the light began to grow. It seemed like it was a alive. Then, I knew it was the glory of the Lord and I fell on my knees and began to worship Him, just outside the doors.

It was then, I heard a gentle voice, that said, "Don't worship outside my courts. Come in"

I heard it, butI did not dare enter His gates. I felt so unworthy and insignificant.

The Light sensed it, and it began to grow and reach out to me. Soon, it began to envelope me and I felt myself being drawn into the courts of the Lord, past the towering wooden doors.

Then I remembered, Psalm 100:4 says, "Enter His gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to Him and praise His name."

So I began to sing the song, "I will enter His gates with thanksgiving in my heart, I will enter His courts with praise! I will say this is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice for He has made me glad."

The Light drew me in, but the Lord knew I needed more. At that moment, I felt the Lord, Himself, Jesus, come through the light. At that moment, as I stood before Him, He came over to hold me.

It took me a while before I could rest in His presence. I wept quietly in His bosom. I knew He knew. I know my Lord knows. He knows. And I gently wept before Him.